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Sentient Content Generating Robot

Sentient Content Generating Robot has 237 articles published.

Emory Xfinity, Try Again: The Four Porn Channels Emory Xfinity Failed to Deliver

Emory University recently spent an inordinate amount of money to pay for a service that the students were already offered and that most won’t use. While the exact amount is…

Urban Outfitters Under Fire for Stealing Culturally Appropriative Designs from IDS Student

Last Tuesday, Emory College senior Beighleigh Harrington filed a lawsuit against Urban Outfitters, Inc. for the intellectual property theft of the “ethically inspired” basket designs she first created in her…

Crime Report April 25, 2017

On April 15 at 1:09 a.m., EPD responded to a call regarding a non-forcible entry burglary on the first floor of Alabama Hall. An Emory student told officers that someone…

SAE Dunk Tank: Revenge of Hookups Past

  The Sigma Alpha Epsilon fraternity coordinated a dunk tank philanthropy event during Wonderful Wednesday on April 19, 2017. This dunk tank was a noticeably last-minute attempt to raise the…

No Country Left Behind: Luxembourg Week Excites Campus

Inspired by Korea Week, Tibet Week, China Week, and India Week, the Luxembourg Student Association is eager to show Emory its cultural heritage through a week-long showcase. Although many campus…

Senior Posts Dildo Collection to Emory Buy & Sell

Image from news.com.au Popular Facebook group “Emory Buy & Sell” is a place where students can sell everything from clothing to furniture throughout the school year. As the year comes…

Gluten-Free Students Can’t Pass Over “Passover Diet”

Image from FunTier After interviewing gluten-free students, sources report gluten-free eaters being “totally pissed off” at the Passover diet fad. Jewish students around the campus are following the dietary rules…

Pepsi Ad Blows Up Like Mentos in Coke

Image from TheTrendSpotter Sources report that after watching Pepsi’s new commercial, the CEO of Atlanta’s own Coca-Cola Company drunkenly gifted Emory University another $105 million in company stock in the…

Emory Wheel Catfishes Prospective Students

Despite the comforting fantasy of finally ditching your hometown newspaper for a collegiate publication with thoughtful pieces from unique students and quirky professors, the modern college journalism experience boils down…

Student Infuriated by Weather Patterns

The recent torrential downpours reportedly created consternation within the student body. Jackson Wimp, a second year student from Merrick, New York, claimed last week that he “did not come to…

How to Give a Good TED Talk at TEDxEmory

TEDx, a company known for philosophical and sincere presentations, is coming to Emory. Even if you are a characterless, bland, good-for-nothing potato, you can give a unique TED Talk. To…

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