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Exotic Dancer Candi Lynn Changes Name to Pumpkin Spice

Also available in Venti for the more heavyset gentleman

Also available in Venti for the more heavyset gentleman

Candi Lynn, exotic dancer at the Sleazy Slanket Strip Club, has reportedly changed her name to Pumpkin Spice in a recent marketing move to lure in more customers during the late autumn and early winter months.

Although it will likely broaden the club’s customer base, some have criticized the name change, even going so far as to call Ms. Spice a sell-out.

Longtime Candi Lynn fans have expressed disapproval for what is being called a blatant publicity stunt. Richard Gimsley, veteran Sleazy Slanket patron, voiced his opinion strongly, saying, “I think this is total horseshit! I been going to this club for 15 years to have a little stability in my life! I thought I’d found some girls I could really count on, but just when you think you can trust a woman… boom! She turns on ya! Just like that! Why Esther…”

Ms. Spice defended the name change, saying in a recent interview that it came from the heart. “I’m not just some sell-out. I’m an artist, and any art form can only come from the heart, or a nine million dollar branding campaign. This name change will really open up doors for me both spiritually and professionally. I mean, now I can show guys the Pumpkin Blumpkin and the… well, I guess that’s really it.”

The move seems to be paying off. The Artist Formerly Known As Candi Lynn says she expects her tips to increase up to 12.67% for the remainder of the fall, and potentially into the winter. A spokesman for the Sleazy Slanket even reported that they were expecting around a 1.125% increase in overall club revenue based on extensive market research.

“Pumpkin Spice did great with the focus groups,” stated Slanket marketing analyst and Goizueta business school graduate T-Dog. “Our current projections for this quarter look great. Pumpkin Spice really struck a chord with the female 18-24 demographic, which sort of caught us off guard, but if some ladies want to come up in the club, we’re not gonna say no. I think this is a savvy business move.”

Other area clubs have taken notice of Pumpkin Spice. Slick Ernie, owner of Sleazy Slanket competitor “Starbutts,” stated that he plans to appropriate Pumpkin Spice for his own use, promising pumpkin themed drinks, bouncers, and urinals in the near future.

At press time,  Candi Lynn competitor Kitty “ISIS” Roxxy reported a steep 10.5% decrease in dolla bills made rain from last quarter.

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