When Randy Griffith awoke one morning from troubled dreams, he found himself transformed into a monstrous cockroach in his extra-long twin bed. He lay on his armour-hard back and saw, as he lifted his head up a little, his brown,…
The Emory Spoke
Any Emory student who has stepped outside their dorm has seen the giant cockroaches that reside on campus. Some students may even believe that we are safe, and that the cockroaches are merely an annoyance. However, this comforting assumption is…
According to sources in Longstreet-Means Hall, Jennifer Steele’s new serious boyfriend Jonathan Baxter is a senior, holy shit. Jonathan, who intends to work at Deloitte next year, because good Lord he is old, reportedly met Jennifer at a small gathering…
According to recent reports, a brave Political Science professor managed to pretend for a brief moment like he truly wouldn’t mind having to pronounce the mind-bogglingly complicated name of an international student for the rest of the semester. Sources say…