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The Emory Spoke

How to Maintain Your Swag While Shitting Next to Someone

You waited all day for this moment. You sat through your psych lecture and each time a gurgling noise emanated from your stomach, you spun around in your chair, pretending to look for the culprit. No one had any idea…

Help! I Think My Mom Is Using ChatGPT To Respond To My Texts!

Something’s going on. Your mom is responding to your homesick texts much faster than usual:  like, within seconds. What usually just received a thumbs up emoji is now warranting full paragraph responses. For instance, after getting sick from your chem…

How To Hook Up in a Lofted Bed and Still Maintain Your Swag

You’re finally about to get some good use out of that hard blue mattress –  your hookup is coming back to your place! Things are going smoothly until you find the light switch and – oh shit. You forgot that…