On September 5th, the weekly Campus Life Center email update was sent to and subsequently deleted by most of the student body. Those who opened the email were shocked to see that instead of another time-lapse video of the DUC…
Posts published in “Health”
Image from FunTier After interviewing gluten-free students, sources report gluten-free eaters being “totally pissed off” at the Passover diet fad. Jewish students around the campus are following the dietary rules of Passover this week, forgoing bread for matzah: a flourless,…
Sources report a fire broke out around 6:00pm on the second floor of the WoodPEC during a weekly Zumba class this Monday. Officials say this was a standard electrical fire, but we have reason to believe this was an inside…
Experts are reporting today that the Earth faces possible annihilation from a paradox in which every premed student simultaneously claims that they are “not like other premeds.” This latest threat comes close on the heels of the “I just want…