Emory’s Student Programming Council just announced the new theme for the upcoming Homecoming Week: SS Swoop. The theme centers around time on a cruise ship. In accordance with this idea, SPC will host a slew of related events and decorate the campus for the student body to feel like they have been whisked away from Emory and onto the mighty seas.
This year, the organization hopes to provide an experience more authentic than ever before; the Homecoming chairs Ben Terrden and Wei Aress announced they will hire a professional actor to feign seasickness throughout the week.
“In the past, we have always focused on the positives of every theme,” Aress states. “Last year, for instance, we talked about the fun of games like Candyland, but not how they are gateways to crippling gambling addictions. This year that all changes. We need to capture how it feels to be on a cruise ship, and that includes having a person who doesn’t have the sealegs for the week.”
The actor will be tasked with moaning from queasiness and vomiting over railings across campus. He will also have to declare how betrayed he feels by his rubber bracelet that was supposed to “use science to calm the dizzy gremlins in [his] wrist and prevent seasickness.”
Terrden continues, “We are excited about how this actor will contribute to the nautical vibe on campus. I personally cannot wait for Friday night of the week. During and after the concert, I bet lots of people will embrace this theme and vomit everywhere. It will be like the ship got caught in a big swell or even a flash storm! Batten down the hatches, Emory! The SS Swoop will be leaving the port and we are all onboard.”
At press time, the Homecoming chairs announced additional initiatives to provide realism throughout the week, including: having hairy men run around in short swimsuits, giving away used and semi-washed towels, and hosting mandatory lifeboat evac drills during the night.
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