This past week, SPC announced the 2020 Dooley’s Week theme was going to, once again, be something oddly specific and outdated. The “Dooley in Montana Underwater with a Gambling Problem in a Swimsuit on the Beach Eating Barbecue Ribs” theme confused, but didn’t necessarily surprise, many students who are still working to figure out what exactly “Swoop State” is supposed to mean.
Said one SPC member, “we don’t really know what it means either, but there will be crepes, for some reason, as well as shitty plastic cups.” In addition to promising to give away unrelated free food and promotional items, SPC has also promised that students will still have to wait in line for over three hours for them. This update reassures students that no matter how ridiculous the theme, nothing has really changed. Everyone can still look forward to waiting in a Disney world sized line for the world’s smallest portion of a smoothie.
In response to complaints they have been receiving, SPC released a statement telling students to, “talk shit all you want, you’ll still put our stickers on your laptops. Thanks for the extra 15 dollars a year, suckers”
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