The opening of the ESC has brought a new communal Gender Neutral bathroom to campus. However, some Emory students have expressed discomfort at using this bathroom as they might be in there while someone of a different gender is also using the bathroom. I totally understand where those students are coming from; I also get poop nervous sometimes. But I would like to take a moment to remind you that you were not always like this.
When you were in a diaper, you were essentially wearing a gender neutral bathroom, regardless of if the diaper had Elmo or Dora on it. Remember when you used to shit your pants in kindergarten? Well, that desk you were sitting at was technically functioning as your gender neutral bathroom. That bush that dogs and frat guys alike pee into does not see gender as well! The Dooley Statue’s hat? You already know. The toilets in the esc bathroom do not care what gender anus that poop is coming from, so you shouldn’t either.
So let us stand (or sit) united peeing into these communal toilets, and not fear the notion that someone of a different gender might figure out that you actually poop (and, god forbid, fart). Join us in our efforts to make all of Emory one giant, gender neutral bathroom by pooping literally anywhere and everywhere you want.
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