Emory’s Pottery Club has been placed on probation with all executive members facing suspension after an unauthorized event last weekend left MLAO riddled with half-finished ceramic bongs. According to witnesses, over 50 students gathered in the basement of MLAO on Saturday night for what was advertised online as a “Bong-making Bonanza.”
Campus police were alerted to the event’s presence when Freshman Aaron Martin was detained for violently banging on the door of Eagle Emporium after closing. The police followed his trail of white cheddar Cheez-its back to MLAO, where pungent smoke permeated through the entire house. “It was like a scene from a movie,” said Officer Tracy Spears. “Tons of smoke was pouring out from under the door and people were running like roaches.”
EPD confiscated 37 bongs and arrested 11 students belonging to the Pottery Club executive board, who will now face disciplinary action. President and organizer Bradley “Sticky Icky” Thompson claimed that the pipes were just for tobacco, asking “could a high person do this?” as he rapped the fast part of “Determinate” from Lemonade Mouth to the officers. He declined to comment further, yelling “rest in peace Pop Smoke” before being shoved in the police car.
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