President-elect Joe Biden is taking a deliberative approach to filling his cabinet, and he has signaled that he wants a diverse administration. “Across the board, we have to make sure that our leadership actually looks like America. My cabinet will reflect our diversity with seats at the table for Asians, Blacks, MILFs, lesbians, and hell, maybe even the furries” Mr. Biden wrote in an op-ed last month.
Bourtney Crown, one of Emory’s own political science professors, will likely have a place in Mr. Biden’s administration. A senior aide on the Biden transition team told The Spoke that the question is not if Bourtney Crown be part of the Biden Administration, the question is in what capacity. Given his completely real and very scientific psychic capabilities, Democratic strategists say Dr. Crown will likely be offered a position as Director of the Central Intelligence Agency or Chief of Space and Extraterrestrial Operations.
Mr. Biden met Bourtney Crown several decades ago at a transcendental meditation program hosted by a local gas station just outside Wilmington, Delaware. Then-Senator Biden’s short stint at the program was meant to clear his mind before beginning the tough job of bringing together Senate Democrats and Republicans to legislate the nascent prison industrial complex into its full potential. While there, Mr. Biden was reportedly rather impressed by Dr. Crown’s alien nude drawings and alleged psychic powers, particularly his abilities in remote viewing and yogic flying. It appears the pair have maintained a cordial relationship ever since.
Dr. Crown founded The Forsight Institute in 1995 with the goal of furthering remote viewing research, and the organization has completed a wide array of projects–initiating contact with Bjzoirk aliens, explaining the assassination of JFK, and producing currency forecasts, just to name a few.
Critics of Crown say his practices are “not based in science,” but the prescient professor has steadfastly defended remote viewing. Dr. Crown defended himself in a 2011 interview with the New York Times and claimed that he saved the U.S. from a nuclear attack in 1995. “My only regret is that I couldn’t save Blockbuster,” Crown soberly admitted.
Clearly attacks against Bourtney Crown did not change Mr. Biden’s attitude towards him. The president-elect ran on a “return to normalcy” foreign policy message, and members on Biden’s transition team tell the Spoke that is what makes Bourtney Crown so appealing.
Only time will tell Dr. Crown’s fate, and many students are still hoping he will not leave. Junior Rohannah Sigh was devastated to hear the news. “I just feel bad for all the students who won’t experience the thrill of being a ‘young master,’” which Rohannah explained is Crown’s signature term of endearment for students.
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