It’s a Friday night and you’re in a frat house. But this is not just any frat house. And this is not just any Friday night. Why is this night different from all other nights, you may ask? Well, my…
Posts published in “The Row”
After the notorious bout of hand-foot-mouth disease first semester, Eagle Row thought their run-ins with obscure diseases had come to an end. This weekend (after several mixers) it was discovered that this is, in fact, not the case. Members of…
Asserting that they’ve never seen a case this severe, doctors confirmed today that local freshman Jessica Schpoonerman has suffered an aneurysm after thinking about Theta too hard. “We’ve had a few cases like this around recruitment season, but yeah this…
Thomas Langdero, sophomore student and recruitment chair for Alpha Epsilon Pi, stared through the glass, sizing up how the potential new members in the maternity ward would fair during the pledging process. While some may argue newborns are too young…