In light of recent confusion and chaos surrounding open expression on the University’s campus, Emory Administration has released a revolutionary new policy that aims to quash potentially harmful discourse at its source: asking everyone to just shut the fuck up. …
The Emory Spoke
Forbidden snacks are forbidden no longer! A new policy has been frantically passed by Emory Dining after riots on Asbury Circle regarding the $20 lobster-crab sandwich sold at Atlanta-renowned food truck “Crust’achin for Sandwiches.” An inside source says that Emory…
There I was, minding my own business, sitting on some concrete outside White Hall for three to seven minutes before entering my 1 p.m. at exactly 12:58. Then I saw him. Swaggering out of White Hall. Tall. At least 5’11’’…
We’ve all been there. You have that one friend who just seems to remember the Alamo a little too much. They only wear Buc-ee’s shirts and somehow have a cowboy hat for every situation. You know not to mess with…